Commentaire sur Le Lévitique 19:3

איש אמו ואביו תראו means, EVERYONE OF YOU SHALL FEAR HIS MOTHER AND HIS FATHER; this is the literal sense. The Halachic explanation of the verse, however, is as follows: Since Scripture says איש I have here only the law that a man must fear his father and his mother, whence do I know that this applies also to a woman? Because Scripture states תיראו (in the plural), it is evident therefore that it speaks here of two (man and woman). But if this be so (that Scripture means to include a woman also) why does it use the term איש, a man? Because it is the man who has the means to do it, whilst the woman is under the control of others (what she does is dependent upon her husband’s consent)(Sifra, Kedoshim, Section 1 3; Kiddushin 30b).

The Torah now begins to explain in detail the commandment to honour father and mother, by writing that everyone is to relate with reverence to his mother and father respectively. These words teach that in addition to providing for aged and economically unstable parents with food, drink and clothing, the children (adults by then) must not look down on their parents who in the meantime have become economically dependent on their children. Our sages spelled this out in Kidushin 31 where they said: “sometimes someone feeds his father the most delicious and expensive dishes while the manner in which he does this contributes to the son’s losing his share in the hereafter, whereas on the other hand, a son could earn his share in the hereafter even by expecting his father to perform physically hard labour.” In the latter case, the son explains to the father lovingly why he cannot offer him luxuries but he treats him with love and concern and listens to his father’s words of advice. Having dealt with the implications of the fifth of the Ten Commandments, the Torah now turns to the fourth of the Ten Commandments, that of Sabbath observance, and writes:

איש אמו ואביו תיראו, "Each one of you shall fear his mother and father." The reason the Torah wrote this commandment next to the commandment to be holy is also related to the legislation about forbidden sexual unions. Our sages in Sotah 36 interpret Genesis 49,24: "and his arms were made firm by the hand of the Mighty One of Jacob" as a reference to how his father's image helped save Joseph from the temptation he experienced at the hands of the wife of Potiphar. At the critical moment, when Mrs Potiphar grabbed hold of Joseph's tunic, he saw a vision of his father's face outside the window. This caused him to resist the advances of Mrs Potiphar and to leave the tunic in her hand and flee her presence. According to the Talmud, Joseph's semen escaped via his hands instead of via his male organ, etc. I have heard it said in the name of Kabbalists (Kav Hayashar chapter 2) that the image of one's father's face strengthens the forces of sanctity within his son and helps him resist becoming a victim to temptation involving sexual abominations. The reason the Torah speaks about "his mother and his father you shall fear," at this juncture close to chapter 18 is that anyone in the throes of carnal temptation should summon up the image of his parents before his eyes. He will find that this will help him resist the temptation.