Musar su Proverbi 28:13

The second principle is leaving the sin: That he should leave his evil ways and decide with all of his heart that he will not continue to return this way again. And if he did evil, he shall not do [it any] more, like the matter that is stated, (Ezekiel 33:11), "Return, return from your evil ways"; and [likewise] stated (Isaiah 55:17), "Let the wicked give up his ways." But know that [in the case of] one who sins by happenstance because he had a desire and his impulse overpowered him and attacked him, whereas his ideas and senses did not rescue him when he encountered it; so they were not quick to rebuke him in the sea of desire, to dry it up - hence the impulse dragged him into its nets and he fell into its snares at that particular time and instant, at the time that the spirit of the evil impulse kicked him down, but not because of his [own] desire and will to find his iniquity and to do like this afterwards: The beginning of the repentance of this man is regret; to place sorrow into his heart about his sin, to have his soul be afflicted and bitter like wormwood. Afterwards, he should increase the fear of sin in his heart every day, and put the dread of God into his heart at all times, until his heart becomes steady in the trust of God. As if the impulse comes across him again - like it does from time to time - and his desire become fanned like the first case, his heart will not be seduced by it and he will abandon its path. [This is] as it is stated (Proverbs 28:13), "but one who confesses and abandons [them] will find mercy" - it mentions "confesses" first, about the regret and the confession; and afterwards, "abandons." However [in the case of] one who is constantly positioned on the path that is not good, and the man who treads on his sins every day and repeats them in his foolishness; and who runs after it many times in his race, loves his evil all the time, places the trap of his iniquity in front of his face - meaning his desire and impulse - and his craving is his occupation; he does not prevent himself from doing anything that he wants to do: For such a man, the beginning of his repentance is to abandon his evil way and thoughts, and to agree, resolve and accept upon himself to not continue sinning. Afterwards, he should regret and return to God, as it is stated (Isaiah 55:7), "Let the wicked give up his ways, the sinful man his plans; let him turn back to the Lord, and He will pardon him." And the parable for this is about one who holds a sherets (an impure crawling animal) and comes to immerse and become pure. For he must first leave the sherets, and then immerse and become purified. But all the time that the sherets is in his hand, his impurity is still with him and the immersion is ineffective. And behold that leaving the thoughts of sin is [equivalent to] throwing out the sherets; and the regret of that which he sinned, the confession and the prayer are in place of the immersion. And when afflictions and aches come upon the evildoer for whom all of his plans are to continue with his crimes, he is first afflicted. And then he repents from the evil thoughts that he thought and cuts off the actions from his hands. And the parable for this is about a calf which they hit with a cow prod to direct his [work on the] furrows. So is one who is positioned on a path that is not good. He should take the chastisement first, to abandon the ways of death and to walk in a straight path - as it is written (Jeremiah 31:18), "I can hear Ephraim lamenting, 'You have chastised me, and I am chastised like a calf that has not been broken.'" And it is further stated after it (Jeremiah 31:19), "Now that I have turned back, I am filled with remorse." [This] means to say, "After you chastised me, and I was chastised and returned from my evil ways; I was filled with remorse afterwards and regretted what occurred with my iniquities." So behold that all of this matter that we have explained has been clarified for you.

And King Solomon, peace be upon him, spoke about the matter of repentance and specified this topic. And he surely opened his words and said (Proverbs 28:12), "When the righteous exult there is great glory, but when the wicked rise up, men will be sought." The explanation [of this] is that the righteous will exalt and honor people about all the good traits that are found with them; but the wicked seek peoples' blemishes and their mistakes, to put them down - even when they have already left these actions and returned in repentance. Afterwards he said (Proverbs 28:13), "He who covers up his faults will not succeed; but he who confesses and gives them up will find mercy." For even though a penitent should not reveal his iniquities to people - as is to be understood from that which is stated, "but when the wicked rise up, men will be sought" - he is obligated to confess them [privately], like the matter that is stated (Psalms 32:5), "Then I acknowledged my sin to You; I did not cover up my guilt." And it is [also] stated (Jeremiah 2:35), "Lo, I will bring you to judgment for saying, 'I have not sinned.'" But the Sages of Israel, may their memory blessed, explained (Yoma 86b) [that] there are times when he who covers up his faults will not succeed - like with sins between a man and his fellow. As he does not attain atonement until he returns what was stolen, extorted or taken unjustly; and until he asks to be pardoned for that which he annoyed him, embarrassed him or spoke evil speech about him. [Likewise must he not cover up his] sins between a man and the Omnipresent that have become known to people. For one who sins publicly desecrates [God's] name (but Rashi, may his memory be blessed, in the Chapter [entitled] Yom HaKippurim, understands it in a different way. See there.) So he is obligated to grieve and mourn about it in front of people to sanctify [God's] name. And this is [the meaning of] that which is written (Jeremiah 31:19), "Now that I have turned back, I am filled with remorse; now that I am made aware, I strike my thigh." The meaning of, "I am filled with remorse," is regret and pain. For the essence of repentance is bitterness of the heart, as we have explained. And [the meaning of,] "now that I am made aware, I strike my thigh," is after people have been made aware and my iniquities have been publicized, I mourned with actions that were visible to people. [This is] like (Ezekiel 21:17), "strike the thigh"; and it is [also] stated (Job 33:27), "He declares to men, 'I have sinned; I have perverted what was right.'"

"But he who confesses and gives them up will find mercy" (Proverbs 28:13): The explanation is that even though there are three foundations of repentance - regret, confession and leaving the sin - (and here it only appears like two,) regret and confession are [both] included in "he who confesses." For one who confesses, regrets. But there is no repentance without these three - as one who regrets and confesses but does not leave the sin is like one who immerses with a sherets in his hand. However, "he who confesses and gives them up will find mercy" - for he is a penitent. [This is the case,] even though there are many levels of repentance, as we have explained.

את חטאי אני מזכיר היום . The Chief Butler was of course, a pagan. He exposed himself to the death penalty by confessing his sins in order to be of assistance to his king, to Pharaoh. It is in the nature of people that when they confess sins they expose themselves to death. What can man do? If he does confess he takes a chance, if he does not confess he is guilty of death anyway. From a Jewish point of view we must say: אשרי אדם מודה על חטאיו ירוחם. "Praised be he who confesses his sins, he will experience mercy." We have proof from scripture (Proverbs 28,13) ומודה, ועזב ירוחם, "He who confesses and abandons [sin] will find mercy." This teaches one to regularly make confessions of one's sins in honor of the King of Kings, G–d Almighty. Provided that such confessions are accompanied by repentance and the forsaking of one's sins, the sins will be swept away to the depths of the sea.

The modest person has charm, as it is said: "And He gives grace to the humble" (Prov. 3:34). The prayer of the modest person is received before the Holy One, Blessed be He, for he, the modest person, is always generous and waives his claims against others. And it is because of this that the prayer of Rabbi Akiba was received when he began, "Our Father, our King" as is commented upon in Ta'anith 25b. The modest man merits increasing wisdom, for he is humble in the presence of the wise and sits at their feet, as it is said: "He that walks with wise men shall be wise" (Prov. 13:20). Heaven has mercy upon the humble person, as it is said: "He who confesses his wrongs and forsakes them shall obtain mercy" (Prov. 28:13).

He who has the trait of impudence commits sins in great quantities and yet considers himself righteous. And it is in this vein that we confess our sins by declaring, "We are not impudent and stiff-necked to say before Thee O Lord our Lord 'We are altogether righteous and we have not sinned.' " And this is a very wretched and evil quality — one who is wicked and yet says "I have not sinned." And for this the Holy One, Blessed is He, judges him and has no mercy upon him, as it is written: "Behold I will enter into judgment with you because you say 'I have not sinned' " (Jer. 2:35). And He has said: "He that covers his transgressions shall not prosper, but who so confesses and forsakes them shall obtain mercy" (Prov. 28:13). And this path of the hard and impudent is far indeed from the paths of repentance. And of the harlot it is said in Proverbs 7:13: "With an impudent face she said to him…". This quality is very evil, for it brings man to shaming his companion and the poor, as it is said: "The poor pleads but the rich answer impudently" (Prov. 18:23). And how much more evil is it when he shames his teachers and acts impudently towards them, and hardens his neck to those who rebuke him because of his excessive rudeness — then this evil quality can remove him from the world. It is proper that a man should far remove any touch of impudence from his soul.

The Rekanati on our verse explains that the importance of the verbal confession is also stressed by Solomon in Proverbs 28,13: ומודה ועזב ירוחם, "but he who confesses and abandons [sin] will find mercy." Confession is part of the attribute of mercy, and repentance helps to restore things to the way they had been prior to the sin, i.e. to remove the forces of impurity from the house of G–d, and to enable G–d to "irrigate" it with the waters of kindness and mercy. I have seen opinions expressed which claim that all that is needed is forsaking sin, remorse, confession and a resolution to do better in the future. Those people hold that there is no need to impose any sufferings on oneself in order to expiate for one's sins. I feel strongly that I must oppose such misconceptions. It is clearly the intent of the Torah and the position of all our sages who are loyal to the Torah that every repentant sinner has to flagellate himself, to fast, and to cause himself such pain as is commensurate with the severity of his sin and the satisfaction the sin had afforded him when he committed it.

If a man has been guilty of wasting seed he must repent without delay and remedy the blemish he imparted to the covenant of circumcision, as I will explain later (in this chapter and in Chapter 68). Even if he transgressed numerous times he should know that the Holy One Blessed is He is a merciful King who accepts the penance of those who return to him wholeheartedly, as it is written, “But he who confesses and desists (from sinning) will receive mercy” (Mishlei 28:13). Moreover, he will be granted an increase in awe and holiness. Thus, by repenting a person accomplishes two things: First of all he receives atonement for his iniquity, and secondly he inherits the World to Come. This is only true, however, if he also clings to the Torah, immersing himself in its study with diligence. To this end he must set aside fixed times for study, on his own and with others. If he is incapable of studying on his own he must at least set aside fixed times to listen to words of Torah. For after a person dies, he is granted a position in the next world commensurate with his merit. In that world there is neither eating nor drinking nor commerce, but only Torah study. Whoever loved listening to words of Torah in this world will merit hearing them from the Ancient of Days in the World to Come. But if he reviled them in this world, he will be unable to relate to them in that world either. Moreover, he will undoubtedly be banished from his partition.