Eclesiastes 7:2 Comentário: Rashi & Kohelet Rabbah

Better to go to a house of mourning. [Where] the type of conduct serves both the living and the dead.

“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting; for that is the end of all men, and the living will take it to heart” (Ecclesiastes 7:2).
“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting.” Why? It is because “the heart of the wise is in a house of mourning” (Ecclesiastes 7:4), as anyone who mourns, the Holy One blessed be He brings him joy, as it is stated: “The humble will increase their joy in the Lord” (Isaiah 29:19).
Another matter, “it is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting” – it is better to adopt a mode of conduct for which there is a recompense, than a mode of conduct for which there is no recompense.²⁷Just as one pays respects to the dead, others will pay their respects to him when he dies. But regarding feasting, it is not clear that he who attends a feast will himself conduct a feast. It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that serves the living and the dead, than a mode of conduct that serves only the living. It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that serves both the wealthy and the poor, than a mode of conduct that serves only the wealthy. It is better to adopt a mode of conduct that involves consolation, than a mode of conduct that does not involve consolation.

Than to go to a house of feasting. [Where] the type of conduct serves only the living.⁷Upon going to a house of mourning a person realizes that he too will be mourned when his time comes. This will cause him to be humbled and make him aware of sin. (Metsudas Dovid) Alternatively, the kindness done for the dead is absolute and the level of kindness [חסד של אמת], for the provider does anticipate any payback because that is “the end of all men.” However, when going to a house of feasting, e.g., a wedding, the newly married couple “take to heart” to remember that act of kindness so that they can return the kindness. The latter type of kindness is somewhat inferior to the former, and therefore Koheles says, “it is better to go to a house of mourning than to a house of feasting, etc. (Binah La’itim) ⁸Frequenting the company of those who pursue honor and vanity arouses one’s lust and desire for those things, and that is the intent of this verse. (Mesilas Yeshorim)

For that is the end of all men. Because mourning marks the end of every person. Every person will ultimately come to this. Therefore, “the living should take it to heart,” [to the fact that] whatever kindness I bestow upon the dead, I will need that they bestow [the same] upon me upon my death. He who raises his voice in lamentation, they will raise their voices in lamentation for him; he who bears the dead, they will bear him; he who eulogizes, they will eulogize him; he who escorts the dead, they will escort him.

Another explanation: For that is the end of all men. For death is the end of all man’s days, and if he does not bestow kindness upon him now, he will no longer [be able to] bestow it upon him, but [if] he invited him to a house of feasting and he did not go, he can say to him, “a son will ultimately be born to you, and I will be there with you, the joy of your child’s wedding will come to you, and I will go there.”

And the living should take it to heart. This matter, that if he does not bestow kindness now, he will no longer [be able to] bestow it upon him.⁹Alternatively, if a person who is planning to do evil visits a house of mourning, he will surely “take it to heart” the matters dealing with death, and will thus abandon his plans and repent before God. (Targum)