Musar zu Ijow 19:29

Now we will explain the principles of repentance. The first principle is regret: His heart should understand that leaving God is bad and bitter; and he should place into his heart that there is punishment, vengeance and repayment for iniquity, as it is stated (Deuteronomy 32:35), "To be My vengeance and repayment." And it is stated (Job 19:29), "Be in fear of the sword, for [your] fury is iniquity worthy of the sword." And he should regret his bad deeds and say in his heart, "What have I done? How did I not have fear of God in front of my eyes, and did not become afraid from the rebukes of iniquity and from the harsh judgments? For there are many aches [waiting] for the evildoer. I did not pity my body; and for a moment of pleasure, my eyes did not pity its being destroyed. I became like a man who robs and extorts, eats and is satiated; but who knows that after his eating and his drinking, the judge will grind his teeth with gravel - like the matter that is stated (Proverbs 20:17), 'but later his mouth will be filled with gravel.' And worse than this, I was cruel to the dear soul and I rendered it impure with the idols of my impulse. And what did it gain from all of its acquisitions, if they are bad in the eyes of its Master? And how did I trade a passing world for a world that exists for ever and ever? How have I become similar to animals? As I have gone after my impulse like a horse, like a mule that does not understand. And I have strayed from the way of the intellect. And behold the Creator blew a living soul into my nose - a wise heart and the benefit of intellect - in order to recognize Him and fear Him and to govern over the body and all of its actions, like it governs over the other animals that do not speak, because it is precious in His eyes. And though I was created like this, it has become the opposite of this in me. Why am I alive? It is like the matter that is stated (Proverbs 21:16), 'A man who strays from the path of the intellect will rest in the company of ghosts.' Moreover I have not [even] fulfilled the precept of the animal. Rather I have been lower than that. For the ox knows its master and the donkey the trough of its owner; whereas I have not known and not reflected. And I have sent my soul to be free from its master. So I have tasted my nectar, but forgotten my end. And I have stolen and extorted and trampled upon the indigent. I have not remembered the day of death, upon which nothing will remain before my soul besides my corpse and my dirt." And this matter that we have explained is that which Jeremiah, peace be upon him, had spoken, "No one regrets his wickedness and says, 'What have I done?'"